Private School Dreamer Pillows

"I'd put his name down for Eton if I could spell it!"

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

Yummy Mummies

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

Young Doctor, Young Nurse, Young Undertaker

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

'Very good, Jeffrey! - You are so creative!'

Good luck in your A Levels.

'I can't take Barbie to Show and Tell...she doesn't have a thing to wear!'

'OKAY, okay Sandra, I'll PAY for your University course. But it BETTER NOT cost me an arm and a leg!...'

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

'Homework done only $1.00' 'Homework eaten only $0.50'

'It's a private school. Can't say which one, it's private.'

'And here's my collection of stock in DiscoCorp... or as I call it, your college fund.'

Private School Interview - 'How much do your parents weigh?'

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

"Progress is coming right along!"

"If you don't wake up and get to work, I'm going to call your mom."

"First I'm getting a Bachelor's Degree, the a Master's Degree, then a Doctor's Degree!"

'Dad's old school teacher was really strict. He still has to go back every night, to finish his detention!'

The existentialist manifesto according to Jean-Paul Sinatra-'oooby Dooby Doo!'

"This isn't bad. Ten per cent all A's."