Academic Professional Gifts

'You know we can't give you a raise right now, but I'll put you on the honor roll.'

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Ethics exam cheater.

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

Flags

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

Pretty Flowers

Eternal Student.

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

"Meet the scribe"

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

"Is it that bad?"