Academic Dreamers Gifts

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"Make a lot of money."

Continuing education.

Exam

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

What do MD and PHD mean? It means the doctor owes a lot of money in student loans.

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

Good luck in your A Levels.

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

'OKAY, okay Sandra, I'll PAY for your University course. But it BETTER NOT cost me an arm and a leg!...'

'And here's my collection of stock in DiscoCorp... or as I call it, your college fund.'

Great news! Scientists have cured many, many diseases! They've used new discoveries and innovative techniques to cure inherited liver disease

"Well, once you get your PhD on 'The Return of the Repressed in Early Jacobean Drama', then we;ll discuss how disappointed you are."

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

"First I'm getting a Bachelor's Degree, the a Master's Degree, then a Doctor's Degree!"

"Graduates, faculty, parents, creditors..."

'According to this stop watch I'm not growing up fast enough.'

'It's true that a college degree might render you overqualified for your present position, but it's a chance I'd take.'

"Sometimes, time travel isn't such a good idea."

The existentialist manifesto according to Jean-Paul Sinatra-'oooby Dooby Doo!'

'Congratulations. It's an eight pound court reporter.'