Academic Competition Pillows

"I'm the only survivor from last semester- what do I win?"

Contest to enter the University

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

"It says 'break glass' but it doesn't say what glass!'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

The rocket powered skiier

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

Miss America IQ Pageant

"Eat my dust!"

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

The First Annual Game Show Week.

'You must be fast, agile and unflappable! Having fun just got serious ponies....welcome to gymkhana!

Ratminton

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

The Alpha Seltzer

'Gee, you beat Roger again!'

Do you want to win the game or my business?

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

Trojan Hurdler.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Danger Slow Sand.