Abundance Appreciator T-Shirts

'If they think the loaves and the fishes generated leftovers, they should see our Christmas turkey.'

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

A Macaroni in 1772

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

'It's a good source of calcium and contains plenty of flabonoids.'

'...if you look at it in the right way it begins to make sense.'

"... And the cold foam cascara nitro goes to Lazarus!"

'I like to use the Law as a jumping off point.'

"The magic's still there, but the sex is terrible."

'I usually fly first class but it doesn't compare to this super-duper, extra special, state-of-the-art, WOW class.'

'You can be replaced by Harry Potter, you know!'

"I'll be grateful for the small things, and you can be grateful for the big things - that way, we'll have it covered."

Life is just four letters...

'To enable them to provide the service we require the procurement team have submitted a request for seven wands, a crystal ball and a time machine...'

Our Yuppie Dad

Common Dodo!

"My third and final wish is for money and wealth—again!"

The World Will Overheat and End Next Week: Like, will it be on You Tube?

'There it is, son. It's all yours. Now go and f**k it up!'

People putting their grocery shopping into shopping carts that are cornucopias.

Couldn't you just lend me a paper clip?

"And if you press that one, someone will come in and tell you what a good job you're doing,"

"The money's not all that flash here, but you do get recognition for good work."

The singular joy of living with a person who routinely glimpses the miraculous in the mundane.

"Due to budget cuts we had to combine our athletic fields."

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

Celebrate National Junk Food Day by 'Going Large'.

"See? Isn't this better than being happy?"

'You're new at this, aren't you?'

There's no cure for birth and death, so you may as well enjoy the interval!

'I thought I heard you rattling around.'

Preparation, limitations of: 'It's true then,' thought Selma, as the swift Samuri assassins scaled the inner walls and raced to the spot where she lay pinned...'there are some things you can't prepare for.'

"Your profile says you like to live life like there's no tomorrow."