Absurd Humor Aficionados T-Shirts

'I can do it! I'm walking!'

Pastry Hat

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

Monster Clown

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

The International Airline Basketball Tournament

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

Chick Billiard Ball

Magnet at scrapyard

"Sorry, Jeff. This just isn't working as I'd hoped."

The Hypnotato,

Cow Pat Planning

Bizarre sights.

Stale Ostrich Egg Throwers

'General, You look pale this morning...' - 'I had a nightmare Admiral! I dreamed the war began!'

"He wants to know if you can move your seat up."

A man shoots his head at a basketball hoop.

Elephant Leak

"Can you suggest a nice Bordeaux that will complement the squirrel-infused manure?"

"I told you not to order the Zamboni."

"Tell me again why we couldn't get an Easter bunny."

'More bad news from the lab. You're allergic to peanuts.'

'...and before we ask the $100,000 question, we've enclosed Carl in our sealed soundproof booth.'

'Well son, it seems a bit of a fuss for an overdue library book.'

'We changed our return policy about 20 years ago.'

God is dead.

"Don't tell any folks in town that Old Bessie's a parasite, O.K.?"

'The whaling crews stopped coming here years ago - why do you ask?'