Abstract Expressionism Lover Gifts

"If that were a Jasper Johns, dear, we could sell it for three million dollars."

Paul Klee

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

That midnight hour when fleeting memories come home to roost.

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

Jackson Pollock Studio

"So, Sandra, what can you tell us about your lovely mood board?"

The Cremaster Cycle

"Feel better, dear?"

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

"She said it has a blistering fervency that reminds her of a slide."

"Wentworth, could I take another look at that reorganization plan?"

'Kafka! Kandinsky! Kokoschka!'

The Abstract, The Modernist, The Avant-Guard.

'I like the frame.'

'Don't know much about art but I know what I like.'

"Smoked salmon, sir?" "I prefer to eat it, thanks."

The less one gets it, the more it's art.

"We're looking for something more over-the-couch-ish."

"I could do that."

"Jackson Pollock's diaper"

"I don't dare take him near the De Kooning exhibit!"

Who are you?

Metropolitan Art Center current exhibit: Father of the Finger-In-Your-Eye School of Modern Art.

'Abstract art is supposed to look that way.' (A rather smarthy attitude in an art gallery)

After three days the curator decided it was probably upside down.

Visitor at an art exhibiton admiring a gallery notice.

Abstract Espressoism

(Gallerie Martorelli) (Art-Babble spoken here)

"It's my latest work...I only vomited it this morning."

'Personally, I don't question these things. My snout period will simply end when it ends.'

"I get my best ideas in the shower."