Abstract Diner T-Shirts

Theories expounded

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

Countervailing Clichés.

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'How is the water prepared?'

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Dali Chooses a Lobster

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

"For drinks or dinner?"

'The customer is always right...'

"Fresh pepper?"

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

'Our special of the day is spam sandwiches.'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

Gone out...here is a computer simulation of your dinner

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

'I'm sorry the cod was not as good as when you came a month ago. It should have been - it was the same fish...'

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

An art director eats: 'Waiter! Does this lettuce say 'salad' to you?'

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

"It's the Chef Surprise."