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Dream Zoom

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

Woman with kids at husbands office.

Stubborn Horse

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'It all started when he tried to assemble a backyard gym without reading the instructions.'

"Showoff"

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

"Mom, can you come get me?"

Signs of Stress

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

A dream of consequence

The Best Laid Plans

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

Having It All

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

"We remain reasonably confident that once we nail down the little network problem we're having, all Hell will be able to break loose according to the modified schedule, which, unfortunately, is in a file we can't seem to locate right now."

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

Careful

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

"Mom?"

Tax Department - Whammy/double whammy

Department to Control Government Growth - 'We need more room.'

Mr. Tatnall's daycare "Just don't kill each other"

Married Life - Poet unable to write because of noisy children

"Don't worry. I'll be right back. I just need a little space."

'Somewhere with good karma.'

ME, MEDITATING ON NO-SELF