Zombie Fan Pillows

'According to you records you're actually dead.'

'Uh-oh, here comes the all-nighter crew.'

'Run for your like! That's no ordinary flesh eating zombie! That's my ex-wife.'

'The whole office is slack-jawed and drooling! It's either a zombie invasion or that smooth jazz you play on the intercom.'

"Why do I always shuffle?"

Day of the Living Lunch!

Watching TV five hours a day saved Vincents' life.

Life is hard when your dad is a zombie.

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

Obamacare: 'We keep shooting them down, but they keep coming back.'

Necrophilia Laws Strictly Enforced.

"Baldo. My name is El Muerto. I have a message for you...from the afterlife."

"No, I'm scarier."

"Hi Mr Zombie! A little walk with your son?"

Don't Worry, Buddy I've Got Your Back!

"All the cremating means fewer zombies."

Zombie scout issues

"I said eye of newt. Not brains!"

Zombie

"Dead man walking."

"He refuses to let me get on with the grieving process."

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."

"Remember that weekend in Saint-Tropez when you tried to eat my small intestine?"

Zombie teacher.

"Let's dig into that. When did you first start feeling like you lost the will to not live?"

"I've been in show business so long I used to make jokes about the end of the world before there was an end to the world!"

Young widow popular at the graveyard

Zombie plumber calling out for drains...

"I'm hooking up with this guy who makes the funniest typos."

"No thanks. I'm not interested in any handouts."

Hello again kitty.

'Of course I am back from the grave, it's really boring in there.'

"One senior and one undead."