Youth Coach Hero T-Shirts

'...And remember' It's not whether your dads win or lose the fight in the stands. It's how you play the game.'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

PROBLEM AREAS

'Well, Scout Smith, escort the little old lay across the street.'

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'Does this get me a purple heart?'

'OK, now let's switch places.'

"Look, I know the other team is taller than we are...but I'm pretty sure this isn't allowed."

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

Mentoring Unit: 'Go on! You can do it! You can be a mentor!'

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

I must not erase major breakthroughs....

'Youth Baseball Clinic: How To Develop A Deep-Rooted Hatred Of The Media.'

"Sure, Pop, I see the ball—what I don't see are incentives."

'Not right now, Timmy. First we're going to work on fielding ground balls. Maybe later we can discuss collective bargaining.'

"It's been a tough season, and you tried your hardest, son. But you're being traded."

"Nicole, Kyle, would you guys burn my yearbook?"

"I feel sorry for kids these days - they're always being tested for something"

Little schoolboy enjoys picking his nose.

Poker Moms

"I'm class president. I need a really big airplane."

Little League Registration: "Um, I think we're gonna need to see your birth certificate again, son. . ."

"If a teacher makes $40,000 a year, and her mortgage is $2200 a month...."

'I must be growing up. I took a bath without being told to.'

Moral Ambiguity

"Brad? This is your congressman. Get Mommy on the phone, please."

"With therapy, I've found I don't need it."

'Angry parents on lines 1,2,3,4 and 5.'

'No, you don't have fever. You have to go to school.'

"Oh, sure, high school. I remember now."