Young Rembrandt Gifts

Just call me Picasso!

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

Child protects planet with umbrella.

Garden.

"I'm starting my own delivery service. Is there anything you want to borrow from my Dad?!"

Professor Tulp meets his match

Playground reputation.

'All dogs have 4 legs. Tabby has 4 legs. But I'm just a kid, so I don't have to think logically.'

"Let's honor this young future farmer - he's ready to endure hard labor, long hours and outrageously low farm prices..."

17th Century Anonymous Dutch Paintings Museum: Formerly 'Rembrandt Museum'.

"You see, darling, he plays a Steinway, just like you."

"Aren't you young to be worrying about college?"

'He's researching out-of-state kindergartens.'

'F.G.G. First Grade Graduate.'

'Mom, am I store-bought or homemade?'

'Fine, I'll go to my room, but one day when I'm a famous artist you'll be telling this story as an amusing anecdote!'

Young boy helping business staff to create a blog.

"When I grow up I'm going to become president and I'm going to abolish homework!"

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

'I'm reading at my grade level, but it turns out there's just no great literature written a my grade level.'

'If the key to effective classroom management is consistency, I guess I'm an effective classroom manager, I am consistently exhausted at the end of the day.'

'This is coming out of your allowance!'

'I love you and your father loves you. Now go paint a masterpiece.'

"There's also a link to my manifesto in the notes section—www.freewilioz.org, articles four and five, respectively."

The children who can't handle dialog will play trees and bushes. They'll be scenery and not heard!

Other Rembrandt Misattributions

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

"Five really snuck up on me."

M- Mouse, L- LCD.

Junior Accountant

'Naughty or nice? -- I was hoping for a little more moral relativism.'

'Blimey! She's good.'

Kid reading Tolstoy's 'War and Peace' as Dad brings in 'The Three Bears'.