Young Firebrand T-Shirts

"There's also a link to my manifesto in the notes section—www.freewilioz.org, articles four and five, respectively."

"My making two million a year, …. It doesn't make me seem 'Mannish', does it?"

"Smokey The Tree"

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

Just call me Picasso!

The New Normal

"I'm both too liberal to be preppy and too conservative to be trendy."

"Let me level with you. I am a lecherous, incompetent, alcoholic, overpaid, sexist senior executive. The company has put me in your way to test your countervailing potential."

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

'Your three o'clock cancelled, we're still awaiting the Parson verdict, and your husband wants to know if the dishes are dirty or clean.'

Policing women's vigil

"We should have stopped these green agitators from making predictions long before their predictions came true."

California fires and Coronavirus

"In a late breaking news story, our TV station is on fire."

'Watch your step, counselor; I can go from zero to bitch in 3.2 seconds.'

Damn these sprinklers and government fire regulations.

"You have to give the younger colleagues the opportunity to fly on their own."

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

"That's not fighting fire, it's wasting water!"

'Some men who go through midlife crises have affairs, some buy expensive sports cars, some climb mountains...'

Setting fire to the US flag

'We are experiencing technical difficulties, please stand by...'

Jimmy Hoffa Jr. performing 'collective blathering' when He implores the crowd to 'take these sons of bitches out'

I told you I lost it in the sun.

"I used to lose my secretaries because they were getting married - now they leave to start their own companies."

"And I'll have my usual - 'Mutton dressed as lamb'!"

"At least we don't have to worry about dudes telling us to smile more."

"Of course we should get equal pay, it's time men realised we're just as greedy as they are."

What If?

'I don't care. You're not going over to the dark side and that's final.'

"I can only discuss salary and benefits. You'll have to analyze the babe situation yourself."

"At this point I think your computer problems needs more than a fan."

"How did you know we were having pancake flambe again?"

"Here's why men are so competitive with us - they know we're going to outlive them."

"If you ask me, the fire has the most potential, but it's the smoke that has people talking."