Young Debater Gifts

'We never should have brought him that little lawyer kit. Suddenly, everything I ask him to do is capricious and arbitrary.'

"Your rule about no yelling out in class...that's a violation of my 1st Amendment rights!"

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

"You're definitely descended from the apes. I'm descended from Adam and Eve."

'I looked, and the Ten Commandments don't say ANYTHING about running with scissors!'

'I'm Timmy Jones of the 'Young Republicans'. I'm collecting to run for president in 2028, and my goal is to be another Ronald Regan!'

Cut the small talk-I'm almost seven.

"Before I say anything, I'd like to have my friend, who wants to be a lawyer when he grows up, present"

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

'Principal Harris, I vehemently deny all the allegations against me. The accusations are a mirage of lies, half-truths...'

"You can't kick me there! According to my Gray's Anatomy I don't have anything called a 'keister'!"

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

"The Supreme Court refused to hear my case, so I'll get off my phone and clean my room like you asked."

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

Dialogue

Difference of Opinion

Changing Minds

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

"Now that's a win."

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

"You're 5 years old now, Timmy. It's about time you retain an attorney."

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

Oz Debating Society. You can't refute everything I say just by call it a "straw man" argument.

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'And let such sacrilege go uncontested? Never! I demand equal time for alternate explanations of things.'

"On the contrary, Bosworth, it's YOU who has lost all perspective."

'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'

'I suppose you're entitled to your opinion, but I still say that Shemp was the greatest of them all.'

Debating Society. I can accept that money is speech as long as we can agree that some spending is like yelling fire in a theater.

Like Minded

A bunch of global warming skeptics want to join eco club. It's a school organization. You have to let them in. But they just want to harass us with selective facts! Today: Eco club. So? Debate is good. You have :An Inconvenient Truth" to counter their arguments. Oh. Great. Now we'll have to read it.

Do you go for Hannity or O'Reilly? Tough call. O'Reilly's presence is so big, fearless. Whereas Hannity has a wicked fast tongue and such inner strength. As symbolized externally by his jawline. O'Reilly is so tall. Something strange is happening. Coulter's a bit masculine for my tastes. Ditto. HOJ.