Yorkie Aficionado Gifts

"Alas, poor Yorkie! I knew him well."

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'We know you have a cat.'

"I yip, therefore I am."

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

"The good news is that a delicious stick of jerky is still a very affordable seventy-five cents."

'I was 'Sweatin' To The Oldies', and I flipped over on my back!'

'Can you tell me where James Herriot lives?'

Crimy, Denis, it used to just be you. . . .

'They should have extra-small thermometers for Yorkies, Doctor!'

Meanwhile in Yorkshire

Sports Memorabilia. It's not an autograph. It's a drawing scribbled by Mickey Mantle. A Yankee doodle!

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, Why are you a Yankees fan? Purple pinstripes are WAY better than blue ones. Go Rockies! See ya in the series this year! -Love, prettyinpurple. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Why do I like the Yankees, Rudy? Dunno. Why do I like Cuban cigars, 100-year-old port, John Wayne, Albert Einstein rubbing my feet while I bathe in salt from THE DEAD SEA?! Um ... Why must I be subjected to letters like this?!?! I can't get past the Einstein thing ...

"It's an 'Ee by gum' bike."

"I dreamed the Yankees lost in Game Seven."

A Day at the Comics Bar

'...Santa delivers to Yorkshire first...everybody else has to wait because they're not as good.'

Stoop Fan

Why are the cartoons in The New Yorker so hard to understand? In the humor universe, they exist to balance out the extremely obvious jokes in "The Fusco Brothers." The New Yorker.

E-Bahgum Mail

The Yankees smashed,clobbered, crushed, subjugated, whacked, humbled, shellacked, smeared Seattle, or was it the other way around?'

"If the Yankees move to New Jersey, will you be going, too?"

'Go ahead, go out, yolk it up a little, but make sure you'r back for breakfast.'

-"Just look at him, he loves me." -"Jesus, you're such a dick-head."

"It won't come back up!"

The new Yorkshire based auction site: E-bay Gum.

"I want a cat."

Tommy John

Society of Professional Yorkshiremen

"Canst tha spare eeeeeee-cigarette?"

'I just sold 50 gallons of blood to buy new hunting equipment. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going home to pass out.'

New Yorkers wear Yankee hats.

'You'll never know how much you mean to me, Stanley! You're my surrogate Yorkie!"

"Most would order red, but I prefer a fine, dry white with my jerky."

"Why do I like the Yankees, Rudy?"