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One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

Couples' therapy

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

WHO checklist

"So, what are you reading?"

"O.K., she's sitting fown to write in three...two....one...."

"I think I gained weight because of the heavy reading Mr. Klacken assigns us."

'Can you debunk my essay?'

"Any ideas? I'm terrible with cursive writing."

How I Spent My Summer Vacation: Page One

Shakespeare working on his "author's bio"

"I wouldn't mind...But he's the teacher."

"Marriage is driving me crazy and she's my designated driver!"

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

"His prose is so muscular."

Admirable People - No.7. The man who invented writing before anyone could read.

"It's a cautionary tale about why we shouldn't cut arts funding in schools."

'126,000 words done...now I just need to work out what order to put them in.'

"Joyce Carol Oates seems to have no trouble coming out with book after book."

"Not sure what to watch? Go to menu/settings/power/off/pick up a book."

"Sorry, but your personal life story just isn't very original."

"I'll run through it again. Hit those keys."

'Here's the first copy. We only printed 1000 copies of your book.'

"Hey buddy! Come over here and draw me something about 'Freedom of Speech!'"

"One of the failed candidates for the copywriters job wants to know 'wart was rong with his applicashun?'"

Writer's Block

"How did I get to be the only one that listens?"

"After endless delays, boarding confusion and lost luggage, it appears he's finally arriving at his conclusion."

"Lately she refers to me as her 'insignificant other'."

"You were right, honey, she was tired... I only had to read six books to her tonight!"

"How long has your husband gone through life with these 'blinders' on?"

"You'd better come up with something that will sell - or else. I hope that was helpful."