Worry Warden Pillows

"No, no, that's not a sin, either. My goodness, you must have worried yourself to death."

That party went well.

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'Go on, Andy, it's high time anteaters learned size isn't everything!'

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

Nervous Oral Testing

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

"Who says you can't take it with you? This one has a fireproof lining."

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

'I can't sleep for thinking about global warming.'

"I made a list of all my symptoms. Lost the list. Can't remember any of my symptoms now."

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

Woman in bed with catalogue of worries.

"That's classic J.R. . . .a little bit business, a little bit whimsy."

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

"But why not be happy about all the diseases you don't have?"

"My problem is I obsess over whether I worry enough."

'Aunt Joan and Uncle Wally took Luci to the emergency room.'

'And as further evidence of global warming, we have a front of fried eggs coming in from the north. . .'

'I'm worried about not being worried...'

"Well, nothing shows up on the tests. Your headaches are probably just stress related."

Concern Chart

"I don't use straws anymore. Straws are bad for the environment."

Dutch Boy With Finger In Dyke

'You worry too much. Next time something goes wrong, try blaming someone else.'

"Did we turn off the stove?"

"Do you have to write down all the things you need to worry about?"

Horses are nervous animals. . .

'So we meet again...'

"Brenda's always been a bit of a worrier."

I didn't experience any of the side effects listed in the enclosed literature. Should I be concerned?'

'Nothing to be alarmed about Mrs.Harvey, kids do this sort of things all the time. I'm sure whatever your Jimmy's gotten lodged up there, we can get it out.'