Workplace Safety Professional Pillows

"All I said was that for health and safety reasons they'd have to leave their phones switched off!"

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

"We need a union!'

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

Time Out For Teddy

Crash Test Dummy Blues

'Yeah, I slipped on a banana skin too...'

The Quotable Ben Franklin. To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals. And not flying thy kite during thunderstorms might help, too!

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

'He refused to climb the ladder without a safety net.'

'Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to our new 'health and safety' officer.'

Labor Day '19

No Smoking.

The Hive, Inc. Think safety! 17 days without a honey boo-boo.

'My horoscope says I'm due for a surprise today.'

'Here are the safety manuals you wanted'

"The following is a test of the fire-alarm system. It is only a test. Please ignore the intense heat and combustion."

A case of runaway forklift Doctor. Do we offer him any compensation?

First Aid Box

'Mr Bluebeard is our safety officer.'

"I was running through the hallways and forgot to watch out for the low-hanging fruit."

"Bob put a chair with wheels on the table and climbed up to change a light bulb. Then the chair rolled away, Bob fell and... well, I guess we need a new industrial safety specialist."

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"I can't believe it! In all my years in corporate business, yours must be the worst case of paper cuts I have ever seen."

Rule one: Never work without a net. Rule two: Specify the type of net.

Maybe next tiime you'll hand in the risk assessment on time

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'

Work Safety - Chemicals.

Office Safety.

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'