Workplace Diversity Enthusiast Gifts

Good Ol' Boys

"Staff support"

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

'I suppose you realize that when I tell everyone back at the office about this you wont be able to tele-commute anymore.'

'I'd also like to welcome Henderson here, who joins us through Equal Opportunities for the undead.'

-Great little number cruncher! -But lousy table manners.

"While you were out, Mr. Sundberg, the little hand went from the one to the three."

"I expect you all to be team players - except Ted, whom I expect to remain team mascot."

"I know it’s a challenge, but it needs your input!" "...Your breadth of knowledge of different interest groups, religions...cultures!" "Right, so the staff Christmas meal will be a traditional lacto-vegan one at a Thai restaurant sometime in March?" "Do you think the Pagans will be OK with that?"

"That's a very good suggestion, perhaps one of the men would like to make it?"

"On a show of hands, do we let Miss Brimshaw into our den."

"I thought you did a great job with your gender neutral statements ... There will be a second date."

"I feel your pain. It's the least I can do for not paying you like a man."

Joan hits the glass ceiling: 'Sorry, but I've decided to go with Wally of Arc...'

'I don't want just a bunch of 'yes' men around here! Hire a couple of women!'

Quiz: Find the Subtle Signs of Implicit Bias

Miss Wilkins, I need you to pop in and hang up my phone for me again.

Really Good Careers: An Equal Opportunity Employer

He was the kind of boss who evoked extreme emotions.

"You are adequately qualified, Mr. Harris, but I'm afraid I'll be hiring somebody else as I don't think I can stand looking at your stupid little face all day long."

"We believe great teams thrive on DIVERSITY, so as opposed to the rest of us Colin is as thick as a plank and has the drive of a sloth with an underactive thyroid."

"Why would anyone question her abilities..."

What to disclose at a job interview

'Why are you only paying me 77% of the amount my male counterparts are getting?'

'You aren't actually being replaced by a woman she's going to be doing her old job and yours.'

"Peace on earth and goodwill to all genders."

'The firm has to start taking diversity more seriously.'

'Can we talk... alone?'

'We believe in seeing ability, not disability. In your case, we see neither.'

'A glass ceiling?...Don't be ridiculous. The sign works just fine.'

Happy everything to everybody.