Workplace Analyst T-Shirts

Mitch learned beneath his conscious thoughts, he felt small,inadequate,desperately in need of strength,competence, power.

"It's the boss's son, what can I do about it?"

'Not in here, stupid - I don't need to!'

'The problem in networking isn't incompatible computers. It's incompatible supervisors.'

"I can't sit down. To prove my loyalty to the company I got branded."

"Of course I welcome criticism. Make it easy to identify the malcontents."

"Looks like we found the issue."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

Profit

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."