Working Multiple Jobs Gifts

"Somehow I'm just not popular. I'm an IRS agent, but I moonlight as a telemarketer and an Uber driver."

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

Jack of all trades

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

"Hello? Speaking, not listening."

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

Multi-Tasking

"I had to skip my workout."

Food deliverer's baby.

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

Businessman wearing many hats.

Woman simutaneously playing the cello and washing man in bath's back

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

"I need to clone myself."

'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'

A postwoman delivers mail together with her baby who is riding in the letter carrier.

"I noticed that since I've been working at home you've been paying me hazard pay. How did you know?"

"I was finishing my homework in the shower to save time!"

"Dude, I'm losing you in this tunnel."

'Hold on, Baby, Hold on!'

Hassled Mother.

Multimedia-Conglomerate-Tasking

"I'll have to put you on hold. I have a bite on the other line."

"And I'm sure no one will mind if we fold a few clothes while we talk."

"Please don't interrupt Mommy when she's in her gym slash office slash living room slash cafeteria."

Dribbling and snoring - proof that men can multi-task.