Working In Retail T-Shirts

"I hear ya. These mall gigs don't pay enough."

Pop's store's wanted ad: MOM.

"Seems we're always on our feet around here."

"There goes Baldo...off to work. He sure is growing up."

Larry's used art

Killer Executive Suits.

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

'She's so put together!'

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

A women in a shoeshop.

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

New Suit.

"How was work?"

New Shoes.

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

Friday

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."