Work Experience Connoisseur Pillows

'Is that the extent of your work experience, court ordered community service?'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"No thanks, I brought my lunch."

Sundar Pichai's first doodle.

"He's an abstract artist."

"We can't actually pay you, but your work will get a lot of exposure."

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

"Can you take a video of me attacking the garbage so I can post it on Instagram?"

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

S**t Threw a Goose

"They got me for pillaging. How about you?"

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

"It's called 'Sold'."

Multi-Species Employment Agency. Did you hire the octopus for that job opening? Yeah, but I did interview other applicants. The frog was a strong candidate ... I'm flexible on location -- I'm an amphibian! The whale seemed to be hiding something. The gap in my resume? Uh ... I was beached for a while. And the pig wasn't smart. I see "USDA Approved" on your resume --- I don't think you understand what that means. The octopus got the job because he was a great multitasker!

"Who's the artist?"

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Somebody should really be filming this for YouTube.

Brighter days are ahead. I love it when I hear that in both news and weather segments of the program.

'What if this time, more heads has made us more stupid?'

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

Note to viewers: we've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

Fascinator

"You have indeed purchased an original Rembrandt. A Ralph Rembrandt."

The Copywriter's Dilemma

'Wonderous drawings Mr. Da Vinci - truly inspiring! Actually I've been working on a few ideas for flying machines myself.'

Social Media Strategy Session. The more friends and family people see on our site, the personal information they'll post. Familiarity breeds content!

Art Gallery: All my own work.

'Well, as a matter of fact, I think you're a pinhead too!'

Irish Bricklayer

'Quick - tell me something about yourself not on your resume that will snap you into focus.'

"Chucky says he can buy and sell me."

Employee Benefits

I.M. sPEIder