Wordsmithing Wizard Gifts

Wussapalooka

'We've called in a team of specialists to discuss how to pronounce your disease.'

'I'm not sure about Winnie the Turd as the name for the main character, Mr Milne.'

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Campaign for Plain English

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

Torturing the English Language

Thru versus Through Traffic

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"Meet The Author"

"She's been so creative lately."

"Do me next."

Edgar Allen Poe

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

First Novels.

Reading my Critics

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Cut Price

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

Backfire

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

Someone who knows apostrophes

Why we need poetry. . .

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

What's normal?

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'