Wordsmith Enthusiast Gifts

Cliche Workshop, "Who wants to get the ball rolling?"

"The quality of the writing is an embarrassment, it has no style, no fluency, no soul!"

'Hello, AA? I'd like to report a minor blip in my otherwise excellent road safety record.'

Major Poets, Minor Poets, Free Agents.

Paul Scott

Michael Frayn

"And if anyone's looking for your new book, it's already in the fifty percent off bin."

'Mom...I need you to ghost write my English Essay.'

Best Seller 'Screw You'. Kiss the Author's Ass 2 PM.

Edna O'Brien

Rudyard Kipling

'Camilo José Cela'

Henry Grumble, an editor to the bitter end.

"It was a day EXACTLY like every other day."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Campaign for Plain English

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Thru versus Through Traffic

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"Meet The Author"

"Do me next."

First Novels.

"She's been so creative lately."

Edgar Allen Poe

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

Reading my Critics

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Backfire

A Copy Editor and His Dog