Wordsmith Of Wines T-Shirts

"Red I think, nothing pretentious. Just something 'avec une soupçon de je ne sais quoi'."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

The Vineyard

Campaign for Plain English

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Thru versus Through Traffic

Torturing the English Language

"Meet The Author"

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

Edgar Allen Poe

"She's been so creative lately."

First Novels.

"Do me next."

Reading my Critics

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

Cut Price

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Backfire

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

Someone who knows apostrophes

Why we need poetry. . .

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

What's normal?

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.