Word Wrangler T-Shirts

"And just where did that extra vowel come from?"

Editor.

"I see here the party of the first part says 'potato.' The party of the second part says 'potahto.' The party of the first part says 'tomato,' the party of the second part says 'tomahto.' Both parties, by mutual agreement, wish to call the whole thing off

'You're doing it again, Milton! You're taking my words and twisting them beyond all recognition!'

They said the same thing, but in very different ways.

"Well, he didn't get that kind of language from me!"

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

This is my first time in an anagram bar. Am I correct in deducing that it's Happy Hour? Phayp Ruho 5-7.

"Ain't isn't a word, and you know it."

Women Argues With Cabby Over Prices.

'I know my memos are looking a bit dated. I have to send for an updated version of the educational buzzword generator software.'

'Tonight's first story starts with a great, big word that I can't read.'

'For snoring?! Hell that's nothin'. I once shot a man for ending a sentence in a preposition.'

'If a picture is worth a thousand words, then your essay is 250 words over the limit.'

Literary rain

"This contract is gobbledeegook. . . I asked for mumbo jumbo!"

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

Sybil Obama

Temporary and Permanent Writer's Block

'Ah, the Bermuda Rectangle for files.'

'There are no stupid questions, so let's also agree there are no stupid answers.'

"We need a better piling system."

Try again - Your password has to include barks, growls, whines and at least one yap.

The Critic...

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

"Great moments in songwriting" "What if she had a little lamb?" "Maybe it follows her to school?" "Wouldn't that make the children laugh?" "Exactly."

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"You call this a brief. It's thirty pages long."

'I can grant you 3 wishes as long as none of them are about getting up on the furniture.'

Bureaucratic castle

'Moon, June...'

"I handle chatty people for him."

"I have a system."

"Not guilty, because your lawyer came up with some great excuses."