Woodsman At Heart Pillows

"Today, son, you are a man."

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

Monkey-artist

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

D.I.Y

Lumber Yard. Luxury Homes! Some Assembly Required.

'They said before they start biting do we practice catch and release?'

"Let's see now - have we got everything?"

"Any beaver can cut down trees, but marquetry, now that's art."

"My mum's favourite recipes are: birch with mayonnaise, oak with tomato sauce, hazel with Dijon mustard, beech with salt and pepper and pine with soy sauce..."

Loggerheads

Lumberjack's Epic Fail

If a tree falls on a philosopher in the woods, and no one is there to hear his screams for help, did he really make a sound?

'It took me five years to learn, but now I can climb trees! Let's see if that darn cat will laugh at me now...'

Lumberjack's Dog

"I touched another squirrel's nuts. Any other questions?"

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

Cutting the tree too early?

A new species just discovered in the Softwood Forest...The TP tree.

Lumberjack:'TIMBERRRR!' Tree:'MURDERERRRR!'

"Oh, I don't forage for acorns anymore....I just order them online!"

"It all started out just fetching sticks, and the business sort of grew from there."

'What did I tell you about feeding your pet beaver table scraps?'

Be careful around Sven. He lets the chops fall where they may!

"Where did you learn to chop trees?"

"Wait! Wait! Wait! I can tell you exactly what it sounds like if I fall and nobody hears it!"

"I'm going to knock you on your Axe!!"

Cutting Down Trees to Build the Ark

'Yuck Mum, this wood is way too dry!'

'All right, Pal, gimme all the money or I'll open up this biefcase!'

"I don't care about the money. I just hate trees."

'There's no inflammation of the wood pole. . . but he does appear to suffer from hardening of the chain saw.'

Paul's Bunions

'Just my luck. I had about a dozen new lures I wanted to try.'

"Honey, I've got to get going, I'm still searching for the forest."