Woodland Romantic Gifts

"I told you before, Joe. . . you need to keep your work and personal life separate!"

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

Welcome Spring.

Poor guy fell asleep with his head in the sap.

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

"I've got you in my sights now, Mister Squirrel, with your fluffy tail and those tiny hands clutching that itty-bitty nut. Aww, you must be hungry...poor little fella... I love you, Mister Squirrel."

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"Have you guys seen my recent collab with the universe?"

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"I got ninety-nine problems, but a birch ain't one!"

'I was told this was a big deer crossing.'

"Listen, pal, I’m not seeing a ‘giant squirrel eating a rib-eye steak.’"

"I brought cocoa."

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"Oh, yeah? Well, you smell nice!"

"OK Dad, I've counted and categorised all the trees in our part of the wood: Now we can start on our sustainability plan..."

Northeastern Deer/Southwestern Deer

"I always knew you'd come back."

Come on Darling: Surely, you don't need a sledgehammer to crack a nut...

"Forget about flowers, trust me, bring her honey: It's a sure way to one's heart..."

A marshmallow? Oh, no, thank you, I'm good.

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

Tree Funeral

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

Deer Crossing Traffic Signs You Don't Often See.

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

If a dog barks in the forest, and no one hears him, does he make a sound?

'He Will!'

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

"Hold up, little dude. I wouldn't go in there yet if I were you."