Witty Pun Lover Gifts

"Think about the honey."

'If you're looking for the one you backed you'll need stronger binoculars!'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

"He refuses to use these now they've made them gender nonspecific."

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

Ghost Scare-apy Sessions

A Brain Drain

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

No, that's "Virginia Wolf" with one "o."

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

I was starting a new chapter in my life and I tripped over a footnote.

'And in conclusion...'

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

Literate Dogs.

Hotness

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

'I collect a different type of oil painting.'

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."

The static electric eel is very rare.

Larry's Literary Market.

Weather forecast

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"

Hell's Schlegel

'You give me goose bumps!'

'It's for my teacher. Do you have one with love spelled right?'

'No, I said put the money in the Caymen Islands.'

"Remember I promised you some fun and games in the bedroom?"