Witty Banter Appreciator Pillows

"Touché"

Cafe Chichi. Are you together? I am, but I don't know about him.

They say I have an infectious smile. I hope that's the only infectious thing about you.

Young Girl: 'Oh YEAH?! Well my Mum's Toy Boy is YOUNGER than YOUR Mum's!'

'You're the only man I know who brightens a room when he leaves.'

'I'm having trouble with drinking. . . I'm getting Arthritis in my elbow.'

'Play ball!' 'What, no foreplay?'

"I'd hit that."

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

"I love this time of year."

Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.

"I never make the same mistake twice. I make it 5-6 times, just to be sure."

When Stupid People Get an Idea

Cold caller.

Heart To Heart

"I don't think you have a case. It's only slander if it's not true, and I've heard you play."

The Gilmore Girls

A lesson in wit

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

Know-it-alls

"Yeah, I know why you pulled me over. But, c'mon. I'm down to half a pack a day and I'm tryin' to quit."

Pick your own fruit or worms.

"Your Honor, I would like the record to state that Mr. Katzman is a 'hostile witness'."

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

"Tom, we've started a little office pool on how long it'll take me to get your job. Want in?"

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

'Yeah, but tomorrow I'll be sober, and you'll still be a giraffe!'

Edwina momentarily considered sarcasm. . .

"Does it occur to you that the only thing separating us is a basket of bar snacks? And a flimsy basket at that?"

"At work, they call me benchmark."

If I may paraphrase an old saying, "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to urinate like racehorses." ! !

Home Business - Wife.

'Sorry, I don't carry cash, I'm married!'