Wit-loving Woofer Fan Gifts

'It doesn't look good. I'm a guard dog. They caught me off guard.'

"How can you be out of wings?"

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

Dog lover

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

"The subwoofers really help."

Loopholes

If a dog barks in the forest, and no one hears him, does he make a sound?

Dogs Must Be On A Leash.

Doggie door in The Pearly Gates.

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

'Time and tide wait for no woman..'

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

'No, and I mean it! We just went for a walk an hour ago.'

'I heard him mention your name, what does neutered, mean?'

"Your sense of humor has gone from dry to arid. . ."

Counsel's Opinion.

"I see a couch."

'To woof or not to woof...'

I bark and bark and bark. . . Therefore I am.

'I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon.'

"He's sending an instant message."

'I think he remembers you, Doctor.'

Collective unconscious.

"Remember - you have sharp teeth and claws, but he has sarcasm."

"We should probably stop calling each other 'Fluffy's person' and 'Fifi's person' and learn each other's real names - now that we're married I mean."

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

Monk & Mandi: "I only obey twice a day."

Dog Dictionary: ARF bow-wow woof.

'Nobody goes there any more.' - 'It's too crowded.'

"Is there a humorist in the house?"

"O.K., your mouth may be clean but I'll bet your mind is filthy."

"I would have thought you'd be pleased."