Wise Crack Aficionado T-Shirts

'If you were your dog, would you pick you for a best friend?'

"I think I've reached that age when I don't remember if I've forgotten something."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

Czarcasm

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'Man, times have changed.'

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

'Not even close man - easy listening's around the corner.'

"I want to be street smart so I can be a road scholar."

R.I.P. ZZ Top - Dusty Hill 1949-2021

'I'm old enough to remember when smiley faces were right side up.'

'The only part of my body that defies gravity is my age.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

"New studies show that the so-called 'lucky man' made popular by the prog-rock band Emerson, Lake and Palmer was, in fact, just very well-connected."

The Thinker. The Listener

Boy whistling at crackers.

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

Nick Cave

Loopholes

Abacus.

'You reek of crackers.'

Not-so-easy listening...

"What am I, chopped liver?"

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

Nick Cave

'Time and tide wait for no woman..'

Easy & Hard Listening Rock Radio.

"It's people like you who are ruining rock and roll for the rest of us."

"Your sense of humor has gone from dry to arid. . ."

Counsel's Opinion.

Mick Jagger.

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

Nick Cave

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'