Winter Contrarian Gifts

"His upper body knows it's winter. His legs are in denial."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

"They're healthy? All this time, Mom said carrots and raisins were nature's candy!"

'Harrison, going against your better judgement has made us a lot of money...'

'The fourth quarter was no walk in the park. Especially for those who count on us to walk in the park.'

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

"It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full if you have a case."

Boy accidentally hits a man with a snowball

"I just completely disagree with what you just said about America lacking focus."

'He's always looking for an argument!'

"What if my bliss happens to be suing people?"

Everyone blames spring for Frosty's disappearance, but Micky 'The sno-cone dude' Peretti sure seems to know more than he's letting on.

"Don't you shush us, mister! We're famous consultants!"

Guru Shifted Thinking

Whipping Cream

Giant 'NO' with a small man holding a 'Yes',

'If everyone's thinking outside the box a man who thinks inside the box is bound to have the advantage.'

The Devil screeming hate speech through a megaphone called "tolerance" at a person holding up a sign that says "free speech"

'Care to gaze on the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

'I used to be a 'nut', but since I made millions in the market, I'm a 'contrarian'.'

Opposing viewpoint.

'I know we're supposed to flock together, but I want to see a different movie...'

'See you next spring, Morty.'

Half full head of hair, half empty head of hair.

'If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.'

ANARCHISTS' ASSOCIATION, 'All right! -- our Government grant just came through!'

'He could never resist taking an opposing position on an old saying...'

Which Brain is Half Full and Which is Half Empty?

"I don't like hearing happy stories."

'You say that like it's a BAD thing.'