Wine Whisperer Pillows

"O.K., Everybody. Stand back! Let it breathe."

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

'Don't tell me, I know this one. Is it wine?'

'You know, I always buy supermarket cava rather than fancy Champagne, and I challenge anyone to tell the difference.'

'I've tried it - it's a 94.3829366, at best.'

"Are you really sure we're supposed to give points for sound?"

"Any advance on 'cat wazz'?

'Yeah, I think it has too much tannin, too.'

"Persistent, well-rounded, and full-bodied, with hints of smoke, and just a soupdon of irregularity."

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

"I just read it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert on a given subject. Janet, start the clock and bring me a glass."

'You got a wine that will go well with bullshit?'

"That's between me and my vintner."

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

'Non-alcoholic wines? Aisle 7, on the left - just keep shoveling dust 'til you hit them.'

Wine Lover

'Maybe it's the wine talking but you look as good today as the day I first settled for you.'

Welcome to my cellar!

"Would monsieur prefer a nice unassuming red or the bad boy of the cellar?"

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

Last wine bar before suburbia

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

'He was letting the wine breathe. But it got a whiff of his cologne and suddenly died.'

'She barely gives the Chateau Haut Brion a chance to breath.'

"Wine is plant-based food."

'I think you'll be amused by its methanols...'

'Yeah, dear, I got the stomping job at the vineyard--you didn't mention they make cactus wine!'

'Inform your grandfather that dropping a Buffalo wing into his Chateauneuf-du-Pape does not qualify as a 9-1-1 emergency.'

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"The full bodied merlot covers up the stench nicely."

'The nice thing about my wine library is, I can't accidentally leave it on the bus.'

'Can you recommend something that will make my date sound interesting.'

'So, hows the ullage?'

"A large scotch, please - I can't go back to the office with wine on my breath."

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."