Wine-o-clock Warrior T-Shirts

"..and he's bringing his friend who has a six pack!"

The Vineyard

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

Yoga for Alcoholics

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'

Portfolio, 2011

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

"Could I have a bottle of the Chateau Lafitte '67 but filled with the wine from Tesco 2019."

Whiskey wars

The virtual wine tasting was a big success

'I'm doing a wine tasting course, it's fascinating. . .'

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

'Well, we turned water into wine. Anyone remember how?'

A high wire act walks over to a bottle of wine.

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

'Frankly, we're looking for someone very much unlike you.'

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

'I'd recommend the white wine.'

'I think we're all safe now. Go ahead and say spatlese.'

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

"Don't feel bad. The rest of us can't hold our liquor either."

"It's amazing! There's even a place to put your beer!"

'Really, Bob, the Wine Fairy?'

Liquor Store - Gift Suggestions.

"My husband makes this wine."

'My first day in our vineyard wasn't a total loss, honey. I found two pennies.'