Wine Novelty Collector Pillows

Unfortunately, Michael's 'wine straw' invention never really caught on.

Clown on bike.

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

'A cheeky red?'

Wine Lady

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

Hay Rides $10

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

"Recalculating route..."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

"Yes, I said bring me the king. . .But not that king."

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

Fossil record player.

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

true love.

A crab with a utility knife claw

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

kangaroos hopping around in a vat of grapes to make wine for Australian wine company.

"Quick swig first?"

Lavatory Waterfall

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"