Wine Fair T-Shirts

'The merlot is 100 merlot; the pinot noir is 100 pinot noir, and the chardonnay is 100 Swiss chard.'

In the Guru District

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Face painting.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'A cheeky red?'

Wine Lady

Bacchus.

Southwark Fair.

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Sauvignon Bonk

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'... And this is my cellar.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Tension filled the tent.

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

"All I did this summer was go fishing, camping, bike riding, swimming, boating, and go the movies, carnivals, fairs, concerts and games. I'm bored."

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

Face painting by numbers.

Amusement Park Fun (Country Style).

Yoga vs. Prosecco

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Big Hank's shooting gallery.

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'