Wine Tasting Event T-Shirts

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Chilean Wine Fest.

"The guests are waiting - how much longer on the wine?"

'Now that's what I call a presumptuous wine!'

'The greatest wine in my collection? Why, it's my '45 Chateau Palmer and, oh, what a coincidence, it's right here!'

'Believe me, nobody ever confuses their wine glass with mine.'

'He'll want you to try the Winelich maneuver first, instead of the Heimlich -- it brings up the food, but leaves the wine.'

"Apparently, there is a difference between red wine and red wine vinegar."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Sloaney Pony.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

'A cheeky red?'

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Yoga for Alcoholics

Wine Lady

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

Sauvignon Bonk

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

Bubbly

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"