Wine Expert Pillows

In the Guru District

'One develops a nose...'

"At last! Something that goes well with us!"

'I'm thinking! I'm thinking!'

'You got a wine that will go well with bullshit?'

'Dear, here's de cantor you asked for, but he swears he doesn't know a thing about aerating wine.'

A Good Year.

"What would you serve with toast?"

Larry Was Into Fine Wines.

'He's been in the wine business so long, he can remember when Chateau d'Yquem as Cabin d'Yquem.'

'My husband will order the wine. He happens to be a graduate of the 3-Second Master of Wine program.'

'Asking my husband if he'd be interested in trying a wine sample is like asking our mastiff if he'd like to sample New York Strip.'

"It's a young wine best drunk in five to six years.''

"This wine is excellent paired with exhaust fumes.''

"The fifth wine has bright apple and pear notes, with just the barest hint of a blinding headache."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'A cheeky red?'

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Sauvignon Bonk

Bacchus.

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"