Wildlife Comedians Pillows

'No, I haven't seen an orthodontist about it — I'm a rhinoceros, dummy!'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

"Happy Gnu Year!"

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

"Too much concealer?"

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"Eat me"

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'Pray for me.'

Penguin

Giraffe Portrait

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

'I wanted a change in decor.'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

Crow and fox

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

"Don't worry, it's not rabies: It's normal for me to foam at the mouth..."

The different taste regions on a blue whale's tongue.

"I see you have extensive wood chuckery experience."

'You're not alone, Mr. Scrapp. A lot of hyenas are sensitive to laughter in the bedroom.'

'I didn't have time to hunt'

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."