Wilderness Navigation Gifts

“So much for Google Maps.”

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

The fate of the emigrant

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Desert Island BBQ

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

'I really think we took a wrong turn.'

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

"Admit it, we're lost."

The Lost World: You are Here

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

'Hey - my dad promised that I'd get a gun.'

'It's okay - he knows how to use the GPS.'

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"Recalculating route..."

'So much for your new Satnav!'

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

'Oh man, we are so lost...!'

Bicycle sat nav.