Wild West Walker Pillows

'Had I'd known it would be such a long walk I wouldn't have worn heels.'

"Ahhh... close enough."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"He's no hat and all corgis."

Sausages.

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

Glue gun? Glitter? Dang it, I grabbed my crafting belt again.

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

Sport Utility Boot.

"It's not a good sign when cowboys start waving back to the cacti!"

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Nun Fight.

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

Toivola Jones and the Search For Spring.

'Rollin', rollin', rollin',...keep them dogies rollin'...'

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

High Riders of the Old West

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"You were the one who thought it was too dangerous to raise a child in the big city."

'Have you been waiting long?'

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

Looks like the bank's director still inside.

"Convertible. Must be nice."