Wig Wizard Pillows

A Head-Dress in 1777

'I had that dream where I go out in public without my hairpiece again.'

'Well, I think it's very creative of the dog to make a wig from his shed hair.'

"Of course, it's MY hair - I've still got the receipt!"

Miss America IQ Pageant

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

D.I.Y

"So long, boys. I'm off to the big city to try my hand at chainsaw sculpture."

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"With strong winds battering the country, the Met Office have issued an amber wig wearers warning."

'Be patient. This summer they'll be 60 feet tall'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

"At the end of the day Simon, money talks!"

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

"Victims of out-sorcery."

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'That's nothing...I've been told my wig takes fifteen years off me.'

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

'Toys?! Good heavens, no! I made my fortune through commercial endorsements.'

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

'He wants some hair restorer for his birthday.'

'Please restore all toupees to upright position.'

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

'Always the wise guy.'

'Have no fear - I'll have the project completed for you in no time.'

"What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing."

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'