Widescreen Watcher Pillows

DVD and Goliath - "When Harry met Sally on widescreen, mmm"

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

Bird Torture.

Tree house.

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

'Beware of falling Humpty Dumpties.'

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'We're there already? I'm still watching my video!'

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

'They might as well sleep all day - all they do is stare at that screen.'

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

Incorrect weather forecasts.

It's a Dog's life

Seatback in upright position, fasten safety belt, listen closely...prepare to be bombarded with promotional advertising through the rest of the flight!

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

A child and a babysitter gazing out of a window

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

And here is the day's news that we are going shove down your throat.

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

"No, I'm not doing my homework, but I am watching a YouTube video of someone doing theirs."