Whittling Wizard Mugs

Whittling a forget-me-not moose for the one you adore...

"My preferred pronoun is they."

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

"What we're looking for is someone who think outside the box?"

"Your appendix is fine. It's your glossary I'm worried about."

'I don't like to brag, but I'm the guy who coined the phrase, 'Honey, I'm Home'.'

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

Book publishing.

Bird reading '1001 pickup lines' - 'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

Great Poets of Catalogdom

'My client stands before you, a jury of his whittling peers ...'

Wordplay: Lemonade - Save the Lemon.

'This one is very effective. It sounds just like a can opener.'

"He spends hours waiting for his muse to strike..."

"And that's when I realized that I much preferred making frothy desserts."

Death Watch

"Many editors take it improve their colons and semicolons."

'Ye gods, Will - art thou still monkeying about with that Ooh-ooh language?'

Author discusses her next sensation novel

'I wrote my own speech once. It didn't sound like me at all!'

Seamus Heaney.

"The Ten Commandments Do-It-Yourself Kit"

The Great Chemical Novel.

'Krork...so...erudite!'

Independant Spelling Consultant.

Accountants around the campfire.

Ezra Pound