White Wine Challenger Mugs

"Given a choice they'd rather a good red... the blood of capitalists!"

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Yoga for Alcoholics

"He loves his leaf blower."

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

'We drove 800 miles for this? If I wanted to look at a roomful of dusty bottles, we could have visited your mother.'

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

Wine Talking

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

'She barely gives the Chateau Haut Brion a chance to breath.'

'I think we're all safe now. Go ahead and say spatlese.'

'Can you recommend something that will make my date sound interesting.'

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

Welcome Home from the Dog.

"She got the house, six thousand a month and custody of our people."

Pat's Bar, Rotgut Tasting 5-7.

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade wine?'

Earl and Lance struggle with their new invention, Chessers."

"Wine is plant-based food."

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

The night they invented champagne.