Whiskey Witticist Mugs

"Why are you giving them whiskey?"

Join me in a Martini?

"I'm afraid our drinking water isn't pure."

Trump Poutine

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"Whiskey...Leave the bottle."

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

Which Hogwarts house are you?

"Hey, who wants to hear a great single-malt story."

'Whiskey and splash, sir.'

The Babe calls his shot.

The Angel's Share

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

'If you don't start feeling better in 24 hours, pour yourself a tall scotch.'

Whiskey Bottle - Well it doesn't look like a paperweight to me.

Beethoven's 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and Fifth.

'We have developed an APP we use to import ingredients from the Internet, merge them in the computer, and then download them into the distiller and then just bottle the output.'

Scotch and soda on a drip.

Witty T-Shirt Guy

"Ain't worth the whiskey!"

"Who, Big Sal? Sure, we were in cahoots years ago, but we fell out of cahoots."

Ethics Committee Meeting Today, BYOB.

"What does 'inexplicable' mean..?"

Pressing Problem

"If the energy drink isn't working, try scotch."

"This is Norman's little bureau of alcohol, tobacco, and firearms."

"Yes, I'm the Cowardly Lion, and I want a double shot of single malt courage for the Yellow Brick Road."

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

"I'll have a Maker's Mark, and she'll have a shot at being the mother she never was."

"Whiskey and splash coming up!"

Need Cash for Alcohol Research.

Common stock, Preferred stock, Private stock.

This whisky is 20 years old!

'My mother WARNED me not to marry a Bourbon!'