Whimsical Wordsmiths Pillows

"Good night, son - sweet dreams and a great sleep experience."

" 'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe; All mimsy were the borogroves, and the mome raths outgrabe fifty basis points."

"Hmm... most of this stuff is past it's spell-by date..."

The Artist

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

Selfie Stick

Girl to boy: 'If flowers could fly, they'd be butterflies.'

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

Best Seller

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

'Actually, I don't get out much. I spend most of my time alone, writing lyrical novels celebrating nature and the interconnectedness of all living things!'

"It's nowhere near as far away as we thought!"

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

"I keep having these funny moods, doctor."

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

"He belongs to a lawyer."

Mother Goose's Haiku

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

"This does not make us friends."

"Blog always makes it all about Blog."

Sharp Eyes

'He never listened to his mother!'

A mermaid is on a rock at the sea: A mermaid falls in lover with her upper half and a shark falls in lover with her lower half.

A Poet

"What's 'ET' short for. . . ?"