Whimsical Trial Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Is it a crime that I ate my yung? They're the best damn Chinese food in town!'

Trial by Media

"You can't plead cute."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."

Counsel's Opinion.

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'

"Not guilty by virtue of reasonable doubt."

Disorder in the Court!

"Your honor, we were having so much fun being sequestered, we forgot what the defendant is charged with."

"One soft drink and eleven stiff drinks."

'Your honor, we are appealing on grounds the post-trial book deals didn't match the pre-trial publicity.'

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

Closing arguments.

"It's clear from the replay that it was a leading question."

'It hasn't been a complete failure - we've learned volumes about falling.'

'Your honor, the defense would like to buy a vowel!'

'Your Honor, we find the defendant to be the subject of misplaced guilt.'

'He's competent in every regard, except to stand trial.'

'I'm not kidding....my client is really insane!'

''Not guilty,' eh? - Color me suspicious!'

Lawyers offices, with todays score card. - Won...Lost ...Tied

'Are you capable of distinguishing right from wrong?', 'Can you give me a hint?'

"That was fun. What time does the next trial of the century start?"

Judge has work boxes labeled Sustained and Overruled.

"So, Mr. Claus, there IS a Virginia!"

Look at what your verdict is doing to my complexion!

"Don't make me come down there."